2.09.2010

Infertility...

It's been a difficult year, to say the least. As most of you know, my husband Matt has been very sick. While I have talked openly about his rare symptoms, unique test results and daily struggles; I have hidden the fact that Matt isn't the only person dealing with medical issues.

After months of contemplating a potential post about my infertility, I have decided that now is the right time to tell our story. Over the last 13 months, Matt and I have been trying to get pregnant. Constant prayers and motivating words from friends and family have helped us remain positive and hopeful. We also rely heavily on scripture combined with our faith in God. Even though we know God has a plan for us, sometimes we lose sight of the big picture and become overwhelmed with anxiety and depression from not conceiving as fast as we imagined.

Matt and I have loved children our whole lives and it's always been our dream to have sons and daughters. Because of that, the thought of potentially not giving birth has consumed my life in a negative way. I'm doing my best to stay positive, but it's so hard.

To make matters worse....almost all of my friends, co-workers, former classmates and family members have called me over the last few months to announce their pregnancies. I'm always so excited for them, but I can't help but cry after our conversations end. I guess those announcements remind me of my situation and gets me thinking about the possibility of never being a mother.

Sometimes I feel guilty complaining about my situation, because Matt and I are truly blessed in so many ways. But regardless, this is a real life problem that won't go away. Along with prayers and long talks with Matt and my family, I have also gotten a major morale boost through a book called "Hannah's Hope". It turns out that me and the author, Jennifer Saake, are part of a large population of women experiencing the same problems.

As soon as I bought this book, I sat down and started reading. It didn't take long to become totally immersed in her story. The first two chapters had me in tears because I felt as though Jennifer was reading my mind and heart. Each page described my exact feelings of hope, worry and fear. This is a wonderful book that I continue to learn from. I recommend "Hannah's Hope" to anyone who is hurting for a child, struggling with the loss of their baby, or anyone who has become a burden bearer for a woman dealing with these situations!

After months of using Clomid to try to correct my problems, my doctor recommended that I see a specialist. Matt and I had an appointment with a fertility specialist Monday in Little Rock. The doctor was so encouraging and made me feel a lot better about our situation. He gave me a game plan that has many options!! I am somewhat of a control freak, so a game plan made me very happy! :)

Basically, the main problem is that I have irregular cycles and never ovulate. However, that will hopefully change soon because the specialist outlined numerous ways to fix my body and had full confidence that I would be pregnant one day! So now that you know some of the details, please keep us in your prayers and I will continue to update our journey on this blog!

86 comments:

Rebekah said...

I have never met you (although I wish I had) and have been a blog stalker for a long time. But, I saw your name on Kelly's prayer list (a long time ago) and have been praying for you since. I will keep sending up the prayers. I have faith that your arms will be filled with a baby one of these days. Until then, I will pray that the Lord will fill that void and make you feel complete! Thanks for your transparency.

nlmcc said...

I also have been a stalker, but I am praying for you as well. I am having problems getting and staying pregnant. We are trying again after having a miscarriage in November, so please pray for me as well. Hopefully we will both be blessed with children in the future. And thank you for having the courage to share.

Jess :) said...

I will be praying for both YOU and Matt. My heart goes out to you. I know how it feels to want children. However, I'm still back at the wanting/praying for a Christian husband part. :)

Please know that you will be added to my prayer list.

Thank you for sharing your heart.

Summer said...

Hi,
I have been a follower of yours for awhile!

I don't want to say I know exactly what you are going through but I have been there with struggles with infertility and I just want to tell you that you aren't alone!

6 years ago my husband and I went on this wild ride to become parents! We thought it would be easty! Boy was we wrong! Almost 3 years later, 2 miscarriages later, 3 surgeries later, several drs., we had our miracle little girl at 36 weeks! She is a true miracle from god she just turned 3!

Over a year ago we found out the reasons for my struggles was that I had dermatomyositis and it reared it's ugly head! It attacks your muscles joints and skin! I was told it was a miracle I had her and survived!!

You to will be a mommy! I share this with you because I don't want you to feel like you are alone!

It is hard when you find out your dear friends are pregnant and you are not, then you feel guilty, etc., it's o.k. to have those emotions!

I have a dear friend whose name is also Summer who is on Clomid and is going through IVF #4! If you would like her blog I would be happy to share it with you....
She is going through this struggle now and she holds on to these words Breathe and Believe....

Thanks for sharing
Summer :0)

The Wades said...

My dear Julee, I can't wait for "the news" that will come in God's perfect timing. I pray for you and Matt and experiencing the joy that pregnancy and babies will bring to your life. You are blessed and I know you will have a beautiful family one day. Your love for babies is apparent, I remember the way you loved on my Claire when she was an infant. You will make a wonderful mother and although I have not walked the same path as you I know many friends that have that now have healthy babies! Keep your beautiful head up and I think it is wonderful you have told your story...there is no telling how many hearts and lives you will touch! love you!!!

Justin and Heather Huskey said...

You are in our prayers! So many prayed for us during our time of struggle and it is so great to be able to repay others for what so many did for us!

Hansen Family said...

Hi Julee~ You are my sister's friend. Melissa... Well I am so sorry to hear your struggles and I hope that Melissa can offer her support and listening ear as she knows all to well what it feels like. I truly hope that your life story of infertility ends with a blessing just like Melissa and Chad. I will pray for you in many ways.

Melissa said...

Julee I am available to talk any time! So glad that Monday went well. I was praying for you and hoping that you would walk away encouraged and with hope insight. I look forward to seeing what this year brings for you and Matt. You will always be in my prayers. I have another book for you when we see eachother again. Have a great day! Melissa

Jill said...

i came over from kelly's blog and have left a couple of comments before.
just wanted you to know i am praying for you~

Sydney, Tom, & Stella said...

Julee,
Thanks for being so honest and open!!! I will be praying for youa nd looking forward to God's perfect timing. You and Matt WILL be amazing parents!
Sydney

Hillary said...

Consider yourself prayed for!!! I've seen God work so many miracles by providing children for lots of my friends who have struggled and I'm believing it for you as well. God is always bigger! Thanks for sharing your heart!

The Bost Family said...

Julee, I have been praying for you since you told me you were trying to get pregnant a year ago. I know you and Matt will be great parents and I will continue to pray for you.

Angela Cliff and Sam said...

You know I am praying for you...my sister let me know that you all have been trying. You KNOW how I struggled with this and then had Sam. I pray that I can one day SOON be as excited for you as you were for me :) Love you!!

Jeremiah & Lindsey Kindy said...

Julee! I know I don't really know you well, but I am a faithful reader of your blog, and you waxed my eyebrows one time, but I do know you will be a GREAT mom when the time comes! Im so sorry about your infertility, but it sounds like you may be heading in the right direction with your journey! I will start praying for you, and Matt, so that one day you may experience what many of your friends are going through! Its a wonderful journey! Keep your head up!

Kelly said...

Julee:
I woke up this morning and just felt like I needed to send you a card in the mail. And then I came here to your blog and now I know why!
I'm glad you want to talk about it and know that you are SO not alone!!! And it's nothing to feel bad about! I have NO DOUBT you will have a baby - and you are going to be the CUTEST pregnant girl ever!
I'm praying for you every day!

Lindsey Conrad - Nabors said...

Julee,
I am so glad that you shared this! You never, ever know what others may be going through in life, and I am glad to know what you and Matt have been dealing with so I can pray for you!

You are so strong and such a beautiful lady and I know that God has such amazing plans for you and Matt and your future family!!

You both will stay in my prayers!

The Wades said...

See what I mean!!! Look at all the comments people are leaving and just think you have that many MORE people praying for you and the family you hope for!!!

Remember....FAITH can not be seperated from HOPE! They walk side by side; hand in hand:)

Heather Allen said...

You are in my prayers girl! I understand the hopelessness, pain, and pity parties...I am a victim of them myself. Then three weeks ago my husband and I received a call to adopt a baby in August!! God will provide...I promise.

the boyd girls.... said...

Praying for you! I "know" of you through several outlets..(some of my best friends from high school went to OBU - and kelly's) but just wanted to let you know that I will add you to my prayer list!
Keri

Carson, Becky, and Maddie said...

Julee,

You went to school with my sister Carrie ( Cooper now flora). I want you to know that I will be praying for you and Matt. I have been following you blog for some time. I can remember what it was like to find out someone else was pregnant when we wanted so bad to become pregnant ourselves. But God is good!!!! He answered our prayers and I know he will bless you with beautiful children. Stay strong and we will pray for you.

Mrs. Cari Leigh said...

I will pray for you and your husband. For health and a baby. I am 33 and dealing with this although it hasn't been as long and I too have very irregular cycles. It's frustrating to say the least but I know that the Lord has a plan for me whatever that may be. I very much enjoy your blog as well :)

Kimberly said...

Julee, I will say a prayer tonight for you and your husband! Thanks for sharing your story! Keep us posted!

Kim said...

Julee, YOu and your husband are in my thoughs and prayers. My husband and I experienced fertility problems as well for over 2 years. We are now expecting our first child in June so please do not give up hope and stay positive! I know it will happen for you! I love reading your blog as I came across it on someone else's blog. We have never blogged about our fertility problems but I have shared with a few people that I have read their blogs and they read ours. Stay strong girl! It will happen!

Katie said...

Julee You are in all of our prayers! I have had family members go through this and all I can say is I am so sorry that you are having to go through it. God has the best timing with everything and He is so Sovereign! So we will just PRAY, PRAY, PRAY! Love you girl!!

Jenna said...

Julee, I am so glad you posted this because now I can pray for you everyday by name! I don't know if you know, but Chris and I went through similar issues with infertility. We TTC for over 2 years and I was annovulatory. We used an RE in Tulsa. If you need ANYTHING - someone to talk to, a specific prayer request, if you want to go to lunch - ANYTHING, please, please let me know. I know we've never met, but my heart has recently been burdened for you, and I committing to lifting you and Matt up daily.

Lydia said...

I'm a faithful reader of your blog. :)
Just wanted to let you know you're in my prayers.

Eric and Leslie Warford said...

Julee- So sorry to hear what you guys are going through. But I wanted you to know that your situation sounds just like my mom's. BUT--I'm one of 4 kids...remember?! Hang in there!!! :)

Leslie

Ashley said...

Julee, thank you for sharing this post! You touched my heart-- I love you girl! Praying for you & Matt. I am here if you EVER need me. I would love to see you again soon & catch up!

blackwellfam said...

How I love you, Julee!! And I love, love that you chose to let God use your story by just being honest about what you're dealing with. I just said a little prayer for ya'll and will continue to do so until that spectacular day when I hear that you and Matt are adding to your lil' family! I love you and miss you like crazy, friend!

Whitney said...

I just wanted to let you know what I will be praying for your miracle! I also struggled with infertility for 3.5 years and remember vividly the heartbreak and tears. It is not easy to keep a positive attitude but your faith will carry you.

It was always so comforting to me to find that we were not alone in our struggles. Take comfort in your friends, family, and bloggers who have been in your situation. The best of luck! You will be a Mommy soon!

Jennifer said...

We haven't met, I connected to you through Kelly's Korner. I have been using chlomid for months as well and just this morning received a call from my doctor referring me to a specialist. I was so frustrated and down and then this afternoon I saw your post. I ordered the book you recommended tonight! Thank you for being so open... God used you in my life today :)

Southern Cinderella said...

I am praying for you and your husband as well as many others that have commented! The power of prayer is a wonderful thing and the Lord has a wonderful plan for you and Matt!

I also think that was very brave of you to share your story :)

The 'Ssippi Scoup said...

Lurker, de-lurking to leave my first comment. I just wanted to tell you not to give up. Although I don't have any personal experience with this I wanted to share a story of one of my best friends. She was diagnosed with pre-ovarian failure in her early 20's which basically meant her body thought she was in menapause. She went through almost 10 years of treatments and after her last round of IVF decided to give it up. It wasn't a pretty time in her life. We are both teachers and that summer she finally decided to give it up, I remember going to her house and her being wrapped up under the blanket in the house with all the blinds closed and lights off, day after day in the dark. That same summer we took a trip to the beach and she started, meaning she wasn't pregnant yet another month. It was so hard for her that we had to pack up and come home. Two months later, after stopping all the treatments, after years of trying, she found out she was pregnant. That child is 6 and in Kindergarten. But she never did anything after her daughter's birth to prevent future babies because honestly she thought it had taken her 10 years to get the first one she really didn't think there was any hope for a second child. I remember her doing things through out her daugther's infancy and saying "this will be my only baby so I'm doing things how I want them and not what everyone says I should do, this is my one shot of having an infant in this house." Well, last weekend she gave birth to her second daugther. Not one, but two miracles!!! I'm not saying you shouldn't do treatments. The point of sharing this story with you is that nothing worked for her as far as medical intervention. And although it was ugly most of the time, she keep her faith and in the end God prevailed. I know it's got to be hard to stay positive but I just wanted to share a major success story and say there is hope.

I don't think I was a reader when your husband was going through the first set of tests. So I'm a little lost on the reasons for the second set of test, but I wish him the best as well. For both of you!

Kodi said...

Julee-
I've been reading your blog for awhile now too, but I rarely comment on any blogs. First of all, I know your pain is unbearable at times, but your faith is an inspiration, and I am so thankful for your bravery in sharing. You never know how many people you can help. That said, I will be praying for you consistently. Our God is bigger than ANY medical diagnosis and I know that you and Matt will be wonderful parents someday soon! Stay strong and know that even though we've never met, I'll be thinking of you and praying for you.

All my love,
Kodi

Kim said...

I don't think I've ever commented before but I wanted to say that I'll be praying for you and your husband!

LESLIE said...

We have never met but I have read your blog for some time. Through a friend of a friend...you get it! Anyways, my prayers are with you and Matt as you begin the next phase of this journey. I, too, have experienced those exact feelings you mentioned and it brought tears to my eyes as I was reading your post. You feel like you are the only one it is not happening for...however, there are so many who are having the same troubles. I miscarried in July and we have been trying since with no luck :) I say that with a smile as I, too, know God has a plan for our family, just maybe not on "my time" if you will. Thank you for sharing your story and know that you are NOT alone. My prayers are with you. Again, thank you...

Lauren Sullivant said...

I love you so much Julee!!! I have prayed sooo much for you and Matt to have a baby and I know you will soon! You are 2 amazing Christians and I admire you sooo much for telling your story! Your honesty is amazing and I know you are going to be such a great mommy one day! And the little boy or girl is going to be such a blessing! Love you both!

Lauren said...

At the risk of saying (annoyingly), "I know how you feel," I will tell you that Jonathan and I "tried" for about a year and a half before seeing a fertility doctor. I am glad your appointment was encouraging--I love a game plan myself! I hope that your relationship with Matt and God are made stronger though all of this. And I hope that you get to be a mom in God's perfect timing (and that that timing is soon!). =)

Whitney said...

I stumbled upon your blog from Kelly's Korner. Just wanted to let you know that I will be praying for you! :)

Sara said...

Julee -

Although I have never met you, we both have struggled with infertility. Me and my husband tried for over three years to conceive and went to specialists, etc. I shared a summary of our story on my blog, but just know you are not alone!

I had many of the same emotions you are feeling and just wanted to give up, but in my heart I just knew we would be parents somehow, either by concieving on our own or adoption.

The road is so long and hard and for those who have not experienced infertility it is hard to understand, but luckily those who do face it seem to stand by one another and give each other support and hope.

I really appreciate you sharing your story and even though we do not know each other I wouold gladly share more about my story and what worked for us with you.

God Bless

The Williams said...

Sweet Julee,
You and Matt are such a wonderful couple and will continue to be in my prayers. I know that it has been a difficult road with Matt's health and you never cease to amaze me with your strength and positive outlook. I just know that God has a great plan for you and that you will be a mommy one day. What a blessing you and Matt will be for that sweet baby. Hang in there and know that we are all lifting you up in prayer!

Mizell Family said...

My husband & I wanted & tried to get pregnant for months... I had every test under the sun done on me, Ben even had a few.. They found no problems so we were frustarted to say the least. We were elated to finally find out we were pregnant!! 5 months later we found out our daughter would never live on this earth... you've read my story, you know how ends.. BUT it showed us more than ever that God is in control, His timing is perfect!! Please do not get discouraged Julee & Matt!! You're in my thoughts & prayers!!

Kara and the Oosterhous Boys said...

Jules:
My sweet friend. You and Matt are both wise beyond your years. Your courage, honesty, faithfulness, and kind hearts are such an inspiration to so many. I consider myself blessed to know you. I have watched you grow physically and I have seen you grow into a beautiful woman and loving wife. You are a nurturer and you WILL be a mom one way or another. God is faithful and his timing is perfect and I know that you and Matt will be blessed byond your wildest imagination. I love you and will continue to pray for you both.

Kara and the Oosterhous Boys said...

Julee:
After reading so many of the comments, I must say "WOW," you and Matt are definitely covered in prayers! You are one special woman.

Taylor said...

Praying, praying, praying!!! For both you and for Matt! I don't know you personally, but I can tell that you would be great parents!

JenleaThompson said...

I've never met you as well but found your blog thru a friend. I understand completely where you are coming from because I am experiencing the same issue. It is difficult to hear friends and family announce they are pregnant and put on a "happy face" but cry afterwards... My husband and I have been trying to get pregnant for over a year and a half... I'm finally to the point where I've accepted it...and turned it over to God... He has a plan that surpasses anything I could hope for and I know His plan for you and your husband is amazing. There are a lot of people praying for you! I know I'm about to say the phrase that you probably don't want to hear...bc I've felt the same way..but it will happen at the right time... You will look at that precious baby and realize it was all worth it :)

Stephanie Wood Smith said...

Julee and Matt, I have high hopes that you will one day be parents! I'm so glad the doctor in LR gave you hope. I can't wait for the blog post that tells everyone that you are preggo!!! I'll be praying for you!

nancy said...

Thanks for sharing your story. I'll be praying for y'all and God's plan for your family.

Amanda said...

Julee,
I'm so glad you got some good news and a "game plan". I am sure it's been a very hard road. We will keep you in our prayers. You both will be amazing parents and have BEAUTIFUL babies!
Much love to you both!

Mrs. Jenk said...

That book is wonderful- I loved it and it gave me such hope as well. The infertility road is full of many forks, but He is walking it with you. You'll get there!

The Doose's said...

Julee! We are all so lucky to have you in our lives! I have been and will continue to pray for you during this trying time. I am so glad the book is helping and I can't wait to hear if the game plan works! So glad that you came to LR for that appointment even in the snow! It was worth it huh?!

Love you!

The Wades said...

I just keeping looking at all the comments in Awww! Have you ever received so many!!?? More prayers will bring more praise!

lukeandlaurawoodard said...

Julee, just wanted you to know that I am praying for you and Matt. I pray that He will create a miracle for your family! I read your blog all the time and never comment. :-) But I have been praying for Matt throughout this past year. I can't wait to celebrate with you when God blesses you with a little one! Love, Laura

Tiffany and the Munchkins said...

I am praying for you both. Thank you for sharing this with us. My heart goes out to you. It sounds like this new course of action for you is very encouraging though. I feel in my heart that you will know the joy of being a mother soon.

Rachel said...

Julee,
Your post had me in tears. I've always noticed from your pictures and stories what a love you have for children. Thank you for sharing your story - please know you and matt are in my prayers! I am so so glad your doctors appoitment was encouraging and how awesome are all these comments?! God will fill every need, every longing, and bless us far beyond what we can imagine (or deserve!!) I'm already looking forward to the day I can rejoice with you (even if it's over the blog) about a precious baby joining your family!

Jessica said...

Wow. You just never know what others are struggling with. You guys are in our prayers.

Nichole said...

I have followed your blog for a while and now feel the need to post. My husband and I are in the same boat. We have been trying to have a baby for 14 months to no avail. We are comtemplating adoption now and are excited to move along with that. I understand exactly how you feel...everyone around me seems to be pregnant or just have had a baby and I wonder why not us? Some days are much darker than others. It seems like everyone else gets pregnant so easily! I will definitly add you to my prayers!!!!

Lauren Kelly said...

Praying for you, friend. Thank you for sharing your story. I am new to the blog and looking forward to that post that I know we'll one day see where you're giving your big announcement. We love you! :)

Katie said...

Julee ~ Love you girl and am always praying!

oliviasmommy07 said...

I am so sorry you are dealing with this. My husband and I are dealing with the same thing. We do have a 3 year old but desperately want a 2nd child. I got pregnant with Olivia in 6 weeks~we have been trying for #2 for a year and a half. I do have irregular cycles. I have tried clomid. Up until recently I didn't know when I would have a cycle and now I am having 2 in 1 month~! SO very frustrating. I will definitely be praying for you and your husband as we both go through this journey

The Mommy said...

I'll be praying for you and Matt as you go through this journey.

Your kids will be so cute!!

Shannon said...

I'll be praying for you because I know exactly how you feel! Sometimes it was so lonely but there is hope! I've heard that book is wonderful. I wish I had heard about it when we were going through this.

Mizell Family said...

Julee, Please know that I was NOT trying to make your pain of infertility any less by retelling our story... my point was for you to know that God has a perfect plan!! We do not understand why He chose to take Weslee so soon.. instead of being mad we were thankful we were even able to get pregnant!! We were in your same position this time last year.. soo confused, frustrated, & tired!! We're now back in that position... BUT this go around we've let go & let God!! As hard as that is @ times we're @ peace with that now. I hate that it took us going through losing our first child to really believe that... I know first hand that nothing I can say can ease the pain of wanting a child. You're in my thoughts & prayers!!

Shannon said...

PS. If you ever have any questions about any procedures feel free to email me. We did so many things before IVF worked so chances are we probably have tried the same things. :) I'm here if you ever want to talk! :)

Brandi said...

I just came across your blog today and I feel like there was a reason I did. My husband and I have been TTC for over a year and a half now. We went through plenty of infertility tests and were finally told that it would be nothing short of a miracle for us to get pregnant. Our issues were with my hubby and do you know how hard it is to watch your husband's heart break right before your eyes. The 'plan' we had for ourselves about becoming a family were shattered within minutes. We know that God will give us a child one day whether it be one of our own or by adoption. We will be parents one day. Don't give up hope. I've been there and still struggle with it from time to time but I have finally decided I need to just have patience and leave it all in God's hands. Good luck on your journey and you will be in my prayers.

Bri said...

Julee~ I've been reading your blog for awhile now. I even have you listed on my blog as a "favorite." When I saw today's post title of "Infertility," my words were "oh no!"

I feel like I am walking a similar road right now. My husband and I have been trying for several months now, and it has been discouraging to say the least. I have found comfort in the blog postings of several women who have walked a similar road.

I must admit that I feel very lonely in real life. I feel like I'm the only one going through this,especially when those around me are announcing pregnancies left and right.

I also recently found the book, Hannah's Hope, and it has been so refreshing to read. I know that I'm not alone in this word. I know that there are others just like me. And, I know that God has not forsaken any of us. I truly believe that He is the one who put the "mommyhood" desires in our hearts, and I believe he will fulfill his promises.

I will be praying for you and your husband as you walk along this journey. I pray that your arms will be filled with the love and joy of a new baby someday. And, I pray that God will provide you the comfort you need along the way. If it's not too much to ask, will you pray for me in this area too?

God bless you Julee and God bless your "someday" child!
~Brianna

Emily Richardson said...

OH MY! Look at all these comments! You did an amazing job sharing your story! I love you tons and will be walking by your side the whole way:)! All of the comments made me cry so I can not imagine the overwhelming, incredible support you are feeling. You are an amazing woman and I am blessed to be your friend. Let me know what I can do anytime! Praying for you as always! -Emily

Also, I think I am going to go get the back so that I can relate more to my patients and have a better idea of what to say/ how to be supportive! Love ya!

Ashley Fisher :) said...

So glad you posted this and shared your heart! I know everyones story is different, but I can totally relate to your feelings. We had some issues getting pregnant at first and now we have two. I cannot wait to see what the Lord does in your life!! You will definitely be in my prayers!

Juls said...

Right now my husband and I are going through the same thing. My thought are with you guys during this very difficult time. It's nice to know that you are not the only one out there going through this, eventhough, it feels like that most of the time!

Natalie said...

Isaiah 64:4: "Since ancient times no one has heard,no ear has perceived,no eye has seen any God besides you,who acts on behalf of those who wait for him." Waiting is so hard to do, but God's timing is perfect!!

Kristen said...

I just want to reach through the computer screen and give you a huge hug! It took us awhile to conceive our second son and I remember the heartache that waiting brought every month. That does not in any way compare to your wait but I know it can be so hard at times to wait on God - but His timing is always perfect. I know this without question or doubt. Stay strong and thank you for sharing your story. I am praying for you!

Emily said...

I,too, believe that God is in total control and it is all in His time, but before you take any more medicine or have any medical procedure done, I would recommend reading "Taking Charge of Your Fertility" by Toni Weschler. It is an amazing book that explains things that doctors can't or won't. I was amazed at how much I didn't know about fertility, and my own body (and I have given birth twice). I haven't had any problems myself, but I have several friends that recommend this book. I read it to just learn more. I know the Rogers library has it.....you might want to check the Fayetteville Library so you don't have to buy it.

Molly and Kevin Strom said...

Julee-
I am not really sure how I came about your blog, but for some reason...God thing im sure i did. I am struggling with the exact same thing and your words are words that I have spoken so many times....all of my friends are getting preggers also and when I find out...i just sob...i am so happy for them, but can't help to feel the pain of not having a baby in my tummy!!! Please know you are not alone and I can't wait to get my copy of Hannah's Hope!!! Praying for you!!

Shanna said...

I'll be praying for ya'll. I know no words will ease the pain, but hopefully knowing that tons of people are praying for ya'll will comfort you in those tough times! Ya'll are a beautiful couple & I have faith that one day ya'll will be wonderful parents! Miracles do happen!!!

Jill King said...

Hey Julee!
My sister (Amy from Metropolis) told me about your blog. She said last night she read both yours and mine and that they were incredibly similar. It's so true! I am going through the same thing right now. My husband and I have been together for 10 years and decided to finally start trying last year. In the meantime, every single friend of mine has gotten pregnant and we have had no luck. I understand how frustrated you are right now and I will keep you in my prayers. Thanks for sharing your story!

Kim Tatman said...

You will be a wonderful, wonderful Mother, soon. I just know it... Love you, Julee
Kim

Melisa said...

Today is the the first day that I have ever read your blod, but I thought I would comment because I know exactly how you feel!! My husband and I have been trying to have a baby for almost a year now. I was diagnosed with Polycystic ovaries and I don't ovulate either! I also tried clomid. But after one round of clomid I had complications and cannot ever take that again!! So now I am trying Metformin and hoping I can ovulate and we can get pregnant!! I also have had so many friends and family members that have gotten pregnany durint this time and it is heart-wrenching. I will pray for you! If you ever want to talk to some one going thru the same thing, you can always email me! Have a great day!

Robin said...

Julee-
We have never met IRL but I would love to someday. You are such a beautiful person inside and out. I am praying for you and Matt to find some answers and miracles along the way. I so look forward to the day when we can celebrate with you that long awaited post telling us you are pregnant. I am local and love seeing Matt on the news and would love to come get my hair done with you someday (I have hair envy for you and that gorgeous hair). The Lord will do great things for you, I just know it.

Robin

Alicia said...

So glad you shared. You are not alone and others need to know that they are not either. I never comment but I always read. Knowing you and Matt personally I know that you both are deserving (and wonderful people) and that in itself will be rewarded. I will be keeping you both in my thoughts and cannot wait until the day that I read on your blog that you will be expecting a baby Turner! Stay positive girl as hard as that can be :)

Emily said...

Hi Julee, I don't think I have ever posted before, but I wanted to say that I will be praying for you. I have lurked around your blog and found you from Jennifer's blog, and thought I would finally comment.

I honestly know how you are feeling. Me and my husband were married in 2002 and we tried for many years to have children. It wasn't until 2008 that I got pregnant... then almost 4 months later I was pregnant again. GOD is good... I don't think he would put the desire in your heart to be pregnant and not let you get pregnant. It will all work out in HIS time... that was hard for me to accept, but it couldn't have happened at any better time for me than it did... I currently get to stay home with both of my babies because I was laid off from my job and I KNOW without a doubt thats why God let me have these two babies when he did and not when I wanted them. Keep praying as will many others will be praying for you too. Good luck, you will look so cute with that bump!

Molly said...

Julee:
I could have written that post...it was me several years ago! I understand everything you are going through...baby showers were the hardest!

We went to the clinic you are probably talking about in LR, then ended up at UAMS.

The one piece of advice I will give you---don't give up! You will be a mommy, and it will make you appreciate motherhood more than anyone who did not have to "want" for a family.

Let me know if you ever need anything....

Molly

LaurenKauf said...

Hang in there sister....It's a tough road, but know you always have people that you can vent to, or relate too. Feel free to ready my stuff. I took a little break due to the lack of end result with clomid... keep your chin high!

waiting said...

I too read Hannah's Hope when I went through secondary infertility. I thought it was an EXCELLENT book. I will be praying for you and your husband. Read my story for encouragement, and NEVER give up hope.

carozza said...

julee,
as you can see i'm so far behind on my blog reading...i'm just getting to this. Please know that you are in our prayers. I know you will be wonderful parents! love you

Jody said...

I found your blog through Kelly's and just read your post. I wanted to share some encouraging news. After having a miscarriage and D & C, my husband and I spent the next two years battling infertility. Like you, I did not have periods nor did I ovulate. We tried the Clomid route and everything. My doctor finally put me on some hormones to make me have periods and I got pregnant 2 months later. We are currently expecting our 4th baby, and he told me that sometimes after they can fix the problem there are no more problems which has been the case here. Even though we do have children now, I can still remember the hopelessness and feelings that it would never happen for us. I will be praying for you and your husband. God bless!

waiting said...

I posted on this same post before, but I just wanted you to know that I continually think of you, and I am praying for you in your time of infertility. God will make a way where there seems to be no way. He did it for me, and He will do it for you too! I am convinced!